EVERYBODY'S A CRITIC

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October 6, 2007, Saturday. - I was totally ecstatic about seeing my work on a particular site.

I know, I know. Kinda pathetic to some of you but (all the same) I was soaring with great spirits that day.

Even if I still had to work on weekends, I didn’t feel any fatigue at all. My, I could do this all night even with these blood-hungry mosquitoes flying around and making that annoying little buzzing echo in my ears.

Anyway, I wanted to share my elation to people whom I knew would be happy for me. But, what did I get? 

“Oh, this is good…but do you want some pointers?” 

Sigh…

I truly wonder why there is usually an urge for people to jump to the chance to share a comment or two or suggest anything although not asked. Yup, unsolicited advice. (I get that all the time.)

The thing is, you can’t please everyone. Fact is, they usually comment – WHETHER you like it or not.

Oh, well. You win some, you lose some.

I’ll bet that most emails are filled with unsolicited advice and comments. ;-)

Arrggh! Why don’t they just be happy that I shared a part of me to them at all? I was not even looking for a suggestion.

Heck, I’ll ask if I wanted THAT.

Guess it all boils down to how unique people are. And, sadly, not everyone sees that at all.

Not everyone wants the same colors to go on a dress or pair of shoes or even your hair dye. No one will want to daydream about Tom Cruise as if he’s the only actor on the silver screen. Not everyone will ever like the sound of another person’s voice even though that person is a professional singer.

There will always be comments to spice things up a bit, and shake one’s world. Some may be bad; others would be a welcoming gesture.

This also goes for writing. Mind you, when I say WRITING, there are still many genres that would come up. 

My thoughts are numerous.

Am I hurt? Yeah, I think so.

It’s just that when I want to share a part of myself – mistakes and all – all I wanted was for people to see that I’m reaching out. Not applying to be part of a certain company.

It’s just like saying that if I want the color red, and someone else likes yellow, so be it.

Let’s just embrace each other’s differences – with all the frailties and strengths. And see the person for who they really are. Don't be quick to comment as if you are molding that person to be a total imprint of who you are or who you are avoiding to be.

I’ve once read in a book that when a person itches to give a comment or two, that means that there is an underlying persona within themselves that they are either trying to hide or won’t even acknowledge to themselves.

What happens is that when they give comments, they aren’t actually commenting on the other person, they are actually saying more about themselves than they would care to acknowledge.

When I think about it, there is a whole grain of truth to that piece of information. It’s like when you say to your daughter, “Why aren’t you orderly with your things?” may imply that you – at one point or another – were actually like that before (even if you don’t admit it now).

It may also be that the comment was prompted because you want to adapt that particular behavior (of being orderly) to yourself.

As you see, you are showing a LOT when you give a comment.

My thoughts are running wild… I’ll probably have to edit this once I’m done.

Of course, I know there is room for improvement. I welcome that. But, during the times that I just want to share a part of me, and am not expecting any comments at all, it would be better to just be happy that I actually shared my work with you.

Hmmm... Why do people have this itch to comment anyway? Is it because they are – by nature – inquisitive and quick to comment about things? Is it the urge to feel superior (subconsciously, perhaps, because no one would ever want to admit that)? Is it because deep inside, they are not really that satisfied with what is shown or told or shared to them – no matter what the other person does?

Times like these, I meditate. I look deep inside myself. If I feel good – no matter what everyone says – then, I’ll hold on to that feeling. Anyway, after a good meditation, I realize that I have the option to act or react to these things.

And you know what I choose?

I choose to act. Sure, it's difficult. But it's a lot better than choosing to react and wasting needless energy on a negative notion. Besides, if I merely react, then, it would mean that I rely more on outer things to make me feel whole.

So… I choose to act - no matter how difficult it would be. (I actually have to remind myself about that always). I try to remember to celebrate the uniqueness of each individual I meet – whether they like what I do and back it up a hundred per cent, or if they would choose to always look for the flaw in things.

These are today’s musings.

Well…back to work. ;-)